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Sleep Tips!
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WE ARE CURRENTLY OUT OF STOCK AND WILL NOT BE ABLE TO SHIP ANY ORDERS FOR THE NEXT 5 PLUS WEEKS. SORRY FOR THE INCONVIENCE.

If you just clicked into our web site and this is your starting point, you might want to start with the first Sleep Tips page or our Home Page. The following table of contents is for the sleep tips section of our site. As you will quickly find, there is a LOT more to this site than sleep tips. Enjoy!

Know Thy Self Things to Avoid Bedroom Atmosphere (Ambiance) Stress…Ahhhhhh! Relaxation Techniques Exercise: Treadmill it! Site References For More Tips

Stress…Ahhhhhh!

Psychology has grown into a huge area of study, so we are going to try and be reasonable with the amount of subject matter we have included here. There are many different theories or descriptive models and many different 'treatment modalities', and much of it can help people help themselves in amazing ways. In this section, we have included an introduction to stress, symptoms of stress, stress related diseases, and offer a few tips to become more aware and take control of your stress. In the subsequent section, we will give you some relaxation techniques that can also help greatly as we move through this intensely demanding society in which we all live and still get a good night's rest.

First, let us briefly define the meaning of stress. "Stress" can apply to many different aspects or contextual dependent areas of life: physical, linguistic, or psychological. We are concerned with physical and psychological stress in this context. So, what is stress for us? Stress is a state of mental, emotional, or physical strain. The things that lead to stress are called "stressors". For example, while crossing the street and not paying attention, a sudden realization that huge truck is about to mow us over can be something that causes stress, and therefore it is a potential stressor. Basically, if something does cause psychological or physical strain, then it can be considered a stressor.

Amazingly, we will soon find, physical and psychological stress, although differentiated, are not separated. Study after study show how there is a huge and undeniable correlation between psychological and physical stress. We surely will not get into the chicken and the egg debate, but will stipulate that there is a generally accepted, reciprocating relationship between the mind and body, which can have a causal relationship in either direction, or stated differently: physical stress can lead to psychological stress and vice versa.

Potential Symptoms of Stress:

• Troubles SLEEPING!

• Anxiety
• Depression
• Constant fatigue
• Increased heart rate
• Dilation of pupils
• Quick, short breathing
• Tight neck, shoulders, jaw, or back
• Tight or strained voice or throat
• Irritability
• Overreaction to events
• Sweaty hands
• Upset or nervous stomach
• Frowning
• Grinding of teeth
• Weakened immune system
  …and more

What modern studies have found is that if we do not deal with our stress, very much like our sleep debt, there is a cumulative affect on your systems. Unfortunately, in many cases persons cannot identify any "major" stressor and do not realize the total overall affect stress is having on his or her life, but it is. Soon, our immune systems become compromised and we become more susceptible to disease, and if we do not address the matter, it can lead to eventual death. And, we are not kidding around or trying to scare you…promise!

Common physical diseases highly correlated to psychological stress:

• Insomnia
• Cancer
• Heart disease(s), including hypertension
• Chronic fatigue syndrome
• Fibromyalsia
• Colitis
• Constipation
• Anorexia nervosa
• Peptic ulcers
• Impotence
• Rheumatic fever
• Rheumatoid arthritis
• Psoriasis
• Asthma
• Migraine headaches
  …and more!

And, there can be amazing negative consequences to our interpersonal relationships. It can make it even more difficult to establish healthy, intimate relationship when there is a lot of physical and psychological stress affecting our lives. If we are not making an effort to handle our stress in a healthy, appropriate, and conscious manner, years of our lives can go by and very little changes are made. Anyone who has dealt with these issues in their own family lives can attest to this clear fact. Lost love, broken relationships, shallow intimacy, loneliness, depression, anxiety, and more are some of the other potential negative consequences associated with stress in our lives.

Tips for Coping w/ Stress

One of the first things we can do is become aware of the stress in our lives. Only then can we choose to deal with it in an appropriate and healthy manner. It is a lot easier to avoid, but unfortunately or fortunately, depending on how one chooses to see it, life has a way of bringing us face-to-face with our 'issues' until we learn to cope with and learn from them. If we either subconscious or consciously choose avoidant behavior, which can be 'negatively reinforced' each time we actually avoid things because of the lacking apparent aversive stimulus, chances are the quality of our lives is greatly diminished and can even lead to death. It can compromise our true freedom of choice, as we begin to move away from certain things that lead to potential stress for us. And in the wake of our denial usually lays frustrated or washed out and caring friends and family. The effects of stress in our lives truly can be devastating.

Of course, there are some circumstances where we should avoid stressors. It would be asinine to stay in the proverbial hot seat where nothing is likely to change and we are subjecting ourselves to things we know are not healthy for others and us. Sometimes it can be hard to discern when we have learned to use our reasoning in a ways to justify our avoidant behavior, and still not take into account all the other possibilities behind our choices.

"Honesty is the best policy."

That is why truly knowing ourselves is so important. If we know ourselves, the chances of knowing when it is appropriate to stay in a certain situation or avoid or leave the situation becomes clearer. We have a greater ability to know our true motivations behind what we do and less chances of error in our appraisals of what is appropriate and healthy for the people for whom we care and ourselves. Basically, we have a greater ability to choose more correct actions for our lives.

So, in short…KNOW THY SELF! We believe this cannot be emphasized enough, so that is why we repeat it again. No apology for the redundancy either.

If we take more time throughout the day to simply become more aware of how we feel and check to see if we are displaying any symptoms of stress, we can apply the proper antidote(s). As we learn to make this a habit, and as things get better, we actually positively reinforce the entire process of becoming more aware, because the beneficial consequences of the actions are added to our lives. It becomes a self-reinforcing process over time. And, it usually gets easier and easier, because as soon as we begin to reflect on our feelings, we find ourselves beginning to relax more quickly and almost immediately. This self-awareness exercise can have an amazing affect on the quality of our lives!

With our hectic, multi-tasking society, it can sometimes be overwhelming with all the different things we need to get done. Simple advice that can help a lot…write things down, prioritize what needs to be done first, and do that one thing without thoughts of the other things on your list, as this can only keep us stressed and can take away from the activity we are doing at that moment. If you feel something becomes more pressing or urgent, reprioritize and start working on the new list. Take your time, and realize you are only one person who can only do one thing at a time. Before you know it, all will get done, as it usually does.

And remember, do not stress over staying focused, but realize your mind has wondered, take note, and bring your mind back to the task at hand. Do not judge yourself, but find the equanimity of your awareness. If we start to judge the process or "doing well" or "doing poorly", we will soon find the entire thing only becoming more and more stressful. Identify the wondering mind, take note, and simply bring it back to the task at hand. Something this simple can truly help alleviate a lot more stress in your lives than you might even imagine.

Take a few minutes out to just breathe, if you are feelings stresses or not. This can have a tendency for our minds to come back into the moment, the only place we truly are, and allow us to know how our bodies are feeling. Just breathe in and out normally and naturally. If you notice your breathing is shallow and quick, then take a few natural deep breaths and slowly exhale each time. After such a simple exercise, we can come back to a more comfortable and natural (more homeostatic) state of being…or less stressed.

When you finally do take some time to relax…do it! Whatever you do to relax, make it a healthy choice first off and then really enjoy yourself in a healthy way. RELAX. If you are with your family, allow yourself to smile and feel good. Sounds like common sense, but it is amazing how we can go on vacation and realize we have forgotten how to actually relax. It is a sign of our times…maybe we should get back to realizing life is not just work, and we start taking some time to truly relax. Enjoy your family, pets, hobbies, TV, a movie, or whatever it is that you do to relax.

Learn to express yourself verbally can be a very cathartic and healthy thing to do. It can be easy to hold so much of our frustrations and concerns inside, keeping them bottled up and building. Let them out in a healthy way verbally. This is where true friends and family can be a live saver.

Do not have expectations for your friends and family to not take part in the conversation and do not get frustrated when they participate or offer advice and question you about things…they usually are doing this because they care! Yes, sometimes we just want to be heard, and we do not want someone to offer advice…that is understandable. But, we probably should not treat our family and friends like they are our door mats, as that is not what they are there for… a true friend cares and will want to help you think things through. This can help greatly and cannot be overemphasized. Blowing off steam is good; otherwise, it potentially will accumulate and can tear us up inside. Most of us are not alone…we just think and believe that we are. There are a lot of people who usually care about us, if we know it or not. Do not push people away, but learn to share in a healthy and openly reciprocating way.

If you feel things are getting out of hand, and you do not know what else to do, do not underestimate therapy, even if you only need to go on occasion. IT CAN HELP. It does NOT mean you are crazy, so please do not think this. There is still a slight stigma associated with going to a therapist for many people in our culture, but those are the people who themselves have a fear of the unknown and are ignorant of what therapy truly is. They usually are not educated on this subject and have preconceived notions that unfortunately are incredibly wrong. What matters more than what these others think of us, is that we are healthy and capable of enjoying our own lives!

Also…WE ALL HAVE ISSUES! If you meet a person who thinks they have none, good advice would be to run. Those are the ones who are in denial of the realities of what is means to be human. There is nothing wrong with asking a professional who is trained to assist you. Like anything on the subject in which we choose to succeed, we start by getting the proper information and go from there. It is a smart thing to do, not a weak or stupid thing to do. The work always comes down to us, as the therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist/social worker are only there to facilitate an awareness and help us apply the proper ways in which to cope. To those who are educated in this subject matter, they know it takes a stronger person to ask for assistance than one who does not. It truly does take strength to allow our selves to be weak. Remember, this too will change.

Realize these few things: you have a choice, there are certain things you can control about your life, and nothing is universally negative. These are the three things that turn our path down the road of depression or learned helplessness. If you want to know more about this, do a search on learned helplessness or cognitive appraisals (attribution styles) on the Net.

Another form of healthy mental and physical catharsis, or way to lease stress, is exercise or some form of physical activity, which we will discuss below (after relaxation techniques) in more detail. Remember, this is not always the best long-term solution for dealing with certain kinds of stress, but a great short-term way to help relieve stress.

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